On my facebook feed today was this post that I felt clearly discerns some of the difference between healthy love and unhealthy love. I’m sharing this with my readers; thank you to Nico Iris who wrote this. The bolding is mine.

♥ Discernment between Addictive Love and Healthy Love ♥
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1. Healthy Love develops after we feel secure.
Addictive Love tries to create Love even though we
feel frightened and insecure.

2. Healthy Love comes from feeling full. We overflow
with Love.
Addictive Love is always trying to fill an inner void.

3. Healthy Love begins with Loving ourselves,
being the Lover we think we need.
Addictive Love tries to avoid looking at ourselves
and always seeks to get Love from that
*special someone*.

4. Healthy Love is based on our ability to Love and
Trust ourselves and hence
others.
Addictive Love seeks sex and romance outside,
precisely because we feel empty inside, and don’t
Trust ourselves or others.

5. Healthy Love allows us to be vulnerable because
we feel secure inside.
Addictive Love is based on a shaky foundation. We
feel we must protect ourselves.

6. Healthy Love grows, like a tree.
Addictive Love grows fast, as if by magic, like those
children’s animals that expand instantly when we
add water.

7. Healthy Love thrives on time alone as well as time
with our partner.
Addictive Love is frightened of being alone.

8. Healthy Love teaches me to value my own
company.
Addictive Love makes me feel uncomfortable with
myself and in need of someone else.

9. Healthy Love is gentle and comfortable.
Addictive Love is tense and combative.

10. Healthy Love flows out.
Addictive Love caves in.

11. Healthy Love creates a deeper sense of ourselves
the longer we are in Love.
Addictive Love creates a loss of self the longer
we are together.

12. Healthy Love gets easier as time goes on.
Addictive Love requires more effort as time
goes on.

13. Healthy Love is like rowing across a gentle
lake.
Addictive Love is like being swept away
down a raging river.

14. Healthy Love is satisfied with the
partner we have.
Addictive love is always looking for
more or better.

15. Healthy Love teaches that we can only
make ourselves happy.
Addictive Love expects the other person
to make us happy and demands that we
try and make them happy.

16. Healthy Love creates life.
Addictive Love creates melodramas

By Nico Iris <3